Edward de Gale, Toronto Pianist, Songwriter and Poet

Thursday, July 20, 2023

The Art of Show, Don't Tell: Tips for Engaging Descriptions and Subtext

The adage "show, don't tell" is a fundamental principle in writing that encourages authors to immerse readers in the story through vivid descriptions and subtle subtext. By showing rather than telling, you create a more engaging and immersive reading experience, allowing readers to draw their own conclusions and connect with the characters and world you've crafted. 

Below we will explore several tips to help you master the art of show, don't tell, enhancing your descriptions and subtext in writing. 

Let's dive in!

  1. Engage the Senses: Invite readers into your story by appealing to their senses. Instead of simply stating how something looks, describe the colors, textures, sounds, smells, and tastes associated with it. By engaging multiple senses, you create a vivid and immersive experience that brings your writing to life.

Example: Telling: The room was messy. Showing: Discarded clothes were strewn across the floor, the air heavy with the musty scent of unwashed laundry.

  1. Use Vivid and Specific Language: Choose descriptive words and phrases that evoke clear mental images. Opt for precise adjectives and adverbs that capture the essence of what you're describing. Be specific and avoid vague or generic language, which can leave readers with a less vivid impression.

Example: Telling: The dog was big. Showing: The massive Great Dane towered over the other dogs, its powerful frame and imposing stature commanding attention.

  1. Utilize Action and Body Language: Actions and body language can convey emotions, relationships, and intentions without explicitly stating them. Show characters' gestures, facial expressions, and physical reactions to reveal their thoughts and feelings. This adds depth and subtext to your writing, allowing readers to infer meaning and connect with the characters on a deeper level.

Example: Telling: Sarah was nervous. Showing: Sarah's hands trembled, her gaze darting around the room, as if searching for an escape from the stifling tension.

  1. Use Dialogue and Subtext: Dialogue can be a powerful tool for showing character dynamics and subtext. Instead of stating characters' thoughts or emotions outright, let them express themselves through dialogue and subtle cues. Pay attention to what is left unsaid and the subtext beneath the words, allowing readers to decipher the deeper meaning.

Example: Telling: "I'm fine," she said angrily. Showing: "I'm fine," she spat out, her voice laced with biting sarcasm and her eyes narrowed in a simmering rage.

  1. Employ Metaphors and Similes: Metaphors and similes offer imaginative comparisons that can create vivid imagery and convey complex emotions. By using figurative language, you show readers a fresh perspective and add depth to your descriptions. Be creative and thoughtful in your choices, ensuring the comparisons enhance the reader's understanding and engagement.

Example: Telling: The moon was bright. Showing: The moon hung in the sky like a radiant lantern, casting its ethereal glow over the sleeping city.

  1. Show through Characters' Choices and Actions: Characters' choices and actions reveal their true nature and motivations. Rather than explicitly stating their traits or intentions, let their decisions and behaviors speak for themselves. Show how characters respond to challenges, interact with others, or make choices that reflect their values and desires.

Example: Telling: He was a kind person. Showing: He stopped to help the elderly woman struggling with her groceries, his gentle smile and willingness to lend a hand reflecting the kindness in his heart.

  1. Set the Scene: When introducing a new setting, show readers its unique characteristics and atmosphere. Use descriptive details to paint a picture and convey the mood, allowing readers to fully immerse themselves in the environment. Create a sense of place that is vivid, evocative, and memorable.

Example: Telling: It was a beautiful beach. Showing: The golden sand stretched out before them, caressed by the gentle lapping of turquoise waves. The salty breeze carried the melodic chirping of seagulls, while the distant cry of children playing echoed through the air.

Mastering the art of show, don't tell is a transformative skill for writers. By engaging the senses, using vivid language, utilizing action and body language, employing subtext, and utilizing other techniques, you can create engaging descriptions and subtext that immerse readers in your story. Remember that showing allows readers to draw their own conclusions and form deeper connections with your characters and narrative. So, practice these techniques, refine your craft, and let your writing come alive with vibrant, evocative storytelling. 

When you should ignore the "Show, Don't Tell" mantra?

While the "Show, Don't Tell" mantra is a valuable guideline in writing, there are certain circumstances when deviating from it can be appropriate and effective. Here is a list of situations where it may be reasonable to ignore or bend the "Show, Don't Tell" rule:

  1. Time Constraints: When you have limited space or time in your writing, such as in flash fiction or shorter pieces, it may be necessary to use concise exposition or summary to convey information efficiently.

  2. Transitions and Scene Changes: During transitions between scenes or time jumps, providing a brief summary or explanation can help maintain the flow of the story and avoid confusion. This allows readers to smoothly transition to the next important moment in the narrative.

  3. Establishing Context: Sometimes, it is more efficient to provide essential background information or context through direct exposition or narrative summary. This approach can save time and prevent readers from getting lost in excessive details.

  4. Character Perspective or Voice: If you want to delve deeply into a character's thoughts, emotions, or unique voice, direct telling can be a powerful tool to reveal their inner workings. This approach helps readers connect intimately with the character's perspective.

  5. Climactic Moments: In highly intense or pivotal moments of a story, a concise, direct statement can heighten the impact and add a sense of immediacy. By using strong, declarative language, you can emphasize the gravity of the situation and evoke a powerful emotional response.

  6. Stylistic Choices: In experimental or avant-garde writing, intentionally breaking the "Show, Don't Tell" rule can be a conscious stylistic choice. It allows you to challenge conventions and create a distinct narrative voice that resonates with your artistic vision.

  7. Information Conveyance: When sharing factual information or conveying necessary details that do not significantly impact the plot or character development, a straightforward and direct approach may be more practical and efficient.

  8. Tone and Mood: Sometimes, telling rather than showing can be used strategically to establish a specific tone or mood in a story. This approach can create a sense of detachment, irony, or satire, depending on the desired effect.

Remember, the decision to ignore or bend the "Show, Don't Tell" guideline should always be purposeful and intentional, serving a specific narrative purpose or stylistic choice. It is important to use these exceptions sparingly and skillfully to maintain a strong and engaging narrative overall.

Happy writing!

Sunday, July 16, 2023

The Misuse of Semicolons: When Writers Try Too Hard to Show Off

Semicolons (aka semi-colons), with their distinctive shape and subtle power, hold a special allure for writers. They are often seen as a mark of sophistication and mastery of the written word. 

However, in the pursuit of showcasing their writing skills, many writers fall into the trap of misusing semicolons, ironically undermining their intended effect. Let's explore why this happens and how to avoid this common pitfall.

Writers often succumb to the temptation of using semicolons in an attempt to elevate their prose, thinking that this punctuation mark adds a sense of intellectual weight or complexity. Unfortunately, this desire to impress can result in the misuse of semicolons, leading to confusion and unintentional errors.

One common mistake is using semicolons to connect unrelated or loosely related independent clauses. Semicolons are primarily used to join closely related independent clauses that could stand alone as separate sentences. Placing a semicolon between unrelated thoughts disrupts the natural flow of the writing and creates confusion for readers.

Another misuse occurs when writers employ semicolons as a substitute for other punctuation marks, such as commas or periods. They may believe that using a semicolon instead of a comma or period adds a touch of sophistication to their sentences. However, this can result in convoluted and hard-to-follow prose. It's essential to remember that each punctuation mark serves a specific purpose, and using them correctly enhances clarity and readability.

To avoid misusing semicolons, writers should focus on the intended function of this punctuation mark: to link closely related independent clauses. When two independent clauses are related in thought and could function as separate sentences but share a strong connection, a semicolon can be used to join them.

Additionally, it's crucial to consider the overall readability and flow of the writing. While variety in sentence structure is important, it should not come at the expense of clarity. Instead of relying on semicolons excessively, writers should explore alternative sentence constructions, such as using commas, periods, or conjunctions to join related thoughts.

An effective way to improve the use of semicolons is to read widely and study the works of accomplished authors who employ them skillfully. Observe how these writers seamlessly integrate semicolons to enhance the flow and meaning of their sentences. Analyzing their usage can provide valuable insights into the proper and effective use of semicolons.

Lastly, a personal note: I find it really annoying when a writer uses a semicolon and then forgets to capitalize the first letter of the second independent clause. It really shows that it is amateur hour when they forget to do that.

In conclusion, while semicolons can add a touch of elegance and sophistication to writing when used correctly, many writers fall into the trap of misusing them in an effort to demonstrate their skills. It is important for writers to remember that semicolons are best used to join closely related independent clauses. By focusing on clarity, readability, and purposeful punctuation, writers can avoid the pitfall of misusing semicolons and achieve the intended effect of their writing—without sacrificing coherence or confusing their readers.

In other words, maybe just don't use semicolons at all if you don't know how to use them properly.

Thursday, July 13, 2023

How to Properly Use Semi-Colons

The semi-colon (or semicolon) is a punctuation mark that is used to separate independent clauses; It signifies a stronger connection between the clauses than a period, yet a slight pause shorter than a full stop.

  1. Use a semi-colon to separate closely related independent clauses; This emphasizes the connection between the clauses.
  2. Use a semi-colon to separate items in a list when the items themselves contain commas; This provides clarity and avoids confusion.
  3. Use a semi-colon to separate clauses joined by transitional phrases such as "however," "therefore," or "for example"; This helps to indicate a shift in thought or contrast.
  4. Use a semi-colon before a conjunctive adverb, such as "however," "moreover," or "therefore," when joining two independent clauses; This improves sentence flow and cohesion.
  5. Use a semi-colon to separate long or complex items in a series; This aids readability and prevents ambiguity.
  6. After a semi-colon, the following word should always be capitalized if it begins a new independent clause; This ensures proper punctuation and capitalization in the sentence.

Remember: The key to using semi-colons correctly is understanding their purpose; Using them appropriately in the context of your writing is essential.

WHEN SHOULD YOU NOT USE A SEMI-COLON?

If a writer doesn't know how to properly use semi-colons, it is advisable for them to refrain from using them. Here's an argument supporting this viewpoint:

  1. Avoid confusion and errors: Improper use of semi-colons can lead to confusion and errors in writing. When used incorrectly, they can disrupt the flow and clarity of the text. It is better to avoid using them altogether than to risk introducing mistakes into the writing.

  2. Simplicity and clarity: Writing should strive for simplicity and clarity. If a writer is unsure about how to use semi-colons correctly, it is safer to rely on other punctuation marks that they are more familiar with, such as commas, periods, or conjunctions. This ensures that the intended meaning is conveyed accurately without introducing unnecessary complexity.

  3. Focus on strengths: Writers should focus on their strengths and utilize the tools they are comfortable with. If a writer lacks confidence in using semi-colons, they can concentrate on other aspects of their writing where they excel. This allows them to maintain a strong and coherent writing style without relying on punctuation marks they are uncertain about.

  4. Edit and seek guidance: Instead of using semi-colons incorrectly, writers can dedicate time to editing their work or seeking guidance from editors, writing groups, or style guides. By doing so, they can refine their writing skills, learn the proper use of semi-colons, and gradually incorporate them into their writing when they feel more confident.

  5. Clarity over ostentation: While semi-colons can be used effectively to convey nuanced relationships between ideas, clear and concise writing should always take precedence. It is better to prioritize conveying ideas in a straightforward manner rather than attempting to use semi-colons for stylistic purposes if the writer is unsure about their proper usage.

In summary, if a writer is uncertain about how to properly use semi-colons, it is prudent for them to refrain from using them. This approach avoids confusion, maintains simplicity and clarity in writing, allows the writer to focus on their strengths, and encourages seeking guidance to improve writing skills over time.

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